When Taryn met Kieran….snippet from chapter three

He was staring at me. My eyes locked with his and I felt like he was boring holes right through me. His look was undetectable, was it recognition or amusement. I suddenly felt uncomfortable. I didn’t know him that I was sure of. His face, that face, was not one that you would forget in a hurry. I shook my head, no; I definitely did not know him. I quickly looked away from him but I knew he was still looking at me, I could feel his eyes on me. The hairs on the back of my neck stood up, why was I so unnerved? I made the mistake of looking back at him and I was right, he was still staring, I don’t think his eyes had left me. I felt myself irk. What was his problem? From across the room a red haired girl appeared and sat herself down on his knee. She took his face in her hands and if Kayla kissing Red almost made me blush then this kiss must have saw me turn fifty shades of red. I decided that must be his girl. When they eventually parted lips, he physically lifted her up of his knee, patted her ass and ushered her away with his hands. Even over the music I’m sure I heard her sigh. She stood and looked at him as if in a sulk but his eyes never left mine. Why was I staring back, why didn’t I just look away? Something about him was magnetic and I seemed incapable of tearing my gaze from his. The redhead obviously picked up on his gaze because her eyes quickly darted to me, if looks could kill I would surely be dead. She turned quickly and stomped off. The corners of his mouth turned up and he broke into a huge grin. He then lifted up his bottle of beer as if toasting me and winked. What an arrogant asshole. All be it a good looking, arrogant asshole. I quickly diverted my eyes away from him and proceeded to engage the quiet guy next to me in small talk, he was obviously shy and conversation was strained, it did nothing to distract me from the fact that I was sure that dick was still staring at me. I was now beyond uncomfortable, I wanted to leave but I also didn’t want to spoil Kayla’s night. She was engrossed in Red on the dance floor, would she even notice if I slipped away. Before I had time to decide what I was doing, the quiet guy next to me was up out of his seat and Mr arrogant asshole was replacing him, slap, bang, face to face with me. He placed a bottle of beer in front of me and clinked his own against it. ” Kieran Cole, my friends call me KC ” he spoke confidently ”Pleased to meet you” he continued. I really was lost for words. Who the hell did this guy think he was?. He had only minutes ago been making out with the redhead and now it appeared that he was hitting on me.
My mouth opened to say something but nothing came out. He may have been an arrogant asshole but he was captivating. He had the most amazing eyes, I couldn’t decide if they were blue or green in the dim light of the bar.. His hair was light brown, flecked with golden highlights, which I guessed were natural and not salon enhanced. His jaw was strong and his features looked like they had been finely chiselled. I was gawping and suddenly he was laughing, ”Like what you see ” he asked cockily. Oh for heaven’s sake, just how much did this guy love himself? ”Get lost jerk” was my feeble reply, seriously could I not have thought of something more biting to say. He laughed even harder and I could feel myself getting even angrier. How fucking dare him! ”I’m not interested” I finally spoke, ”Go and find your girl” I snapped. He looked at me as if confused, ”My girl” he repeated. ”Yes, your girl, the redhead that just sucked the face off you” I spat. His eyes crinkled and he laughed loudly. ”You think that’s my girl ” he exclaimed ”That’s not my girl, she wishes” and he roared with laughter. Oh that was it, I’d heard enough of his bullshit, what an obnoxious prick. ” You disgust me” I told him but he just grinned. ” Keep your panties on lady ” he chuckled and grabbed my arm, ”Look” he said, twisting me around to view a table behind us. There was the redhead in a steamy clinch with another guy. ”Her affections are not exclusive” he informed me. My eyes shot from the redhead and then back to him. Was I fifty shades of red again? ”So, tell me, how have you been Taryn?”. Now I was shocked. How did he know my name? Before I could even ask him and as if he had read my mind he answered for me. ” I have ways of finding out what I need to know” and there was that wink again. Jeez he really liked himself, this arrogant asshole, hot arrogant asshole. ”There is nothing to tell” I said ”I don’t even know you” I told him. He looked completely sincere when he answered ”Yes you do, I just introduced myself, Kieran Cole, you can call me JC ” he grinned. I’m not and never have been a violent person but every inch of me was holding back from slapping him. And kissing him. Shit, where did that come from?
Suddenly I felt it, my skin started to heat up, my breathing became more rapid, and my heart was beating so fast that I was sure everyone in the bar could hear it. Oh no, please no, the more I willed myself to calm down the more I could feel myself losing control. Without saying a word or without me even trying to stop him, Kieran was helping me up out of my seat and escorting me towards the exit. When the cool night air hit me I felt my legs buckle beneath me. I wasn’t sure if it was the panic attack or the alcohol, not wanting to admit it it but I was grateful for the strong arms that kept me from hitting the ground. ”Steady lady” he said calmly. He guided me towards a parked car in the lot and carefully sat me on the hood. ”Nice deep breaths Taryn” he coaxed ”Nice and easy” he repeated, ’’Everything’s good, your safe, you will be fine any minute now”. His words were soothing and slowly my breathing returned to normal, my skin cooled and my heart beat stopped beating like it was going to explode through my chest. Again, throughout his eyes never left mine. I suddenly felt embarrassed and ashamed. I knew that once one tear escaped I would be unable to stop. ”Hey, don’t cry baby” he soothed. My head snapped up, ”Don’t call me baby, I am not your baby ” I screamed as the tears flowed. He took a step back and ran his fingers through his hair. He looked annoyed. ”I want to leave, I need to go home ” I said more quietly, defeated and beat. Without speaking a word to me he pulled out his cell phone and called a cab. He then turned and ran back into the bar. I had offended him, he had helped me and I had yelled at him. Way to go Taryn, but this is what I did, I shut people out and pushed them away, I had a reason for never getting close to anyone; I knew that if I tried it would always end like this. I knew it was a mistake to come to this stupid party.
Just as the cab pulled up, Kieran came jogging back out of the bar. He pulled to a halt next to me and handed me my purse. ”Thank you ” I mustered and turned to climb in the back seat of the cab. What I wasn’t expecting was him climbing in next to me. ”What are you doing? ” I asked slightly annoyed. ” I’m taking you home ” he answered simply. I felt the hair on the back of my neck bristle. ”I can take myself home” I answered, my angry steadily rising. He wasn’t even slightly fazed, ”I know you can, but I’m not letting you ” he said deadly serious. We spoke no more until we reached my destination. Keiran leaned over and paid the fare, I was now too tired to even argue. We walked in silence until we reached the steps of my building. I turned to him and said ” Thank you ” and I did genuinely mean it, regardless of my previous anger at him. He had helped me and I had repaid him by being mean, by being Taryn. He just smiled and shook his head. ”No worries, you feeling okay now ” he asked looking at me intently. I yawned and he laughed. ”Tired but yes, I’m fine” I was suddenly so exhausted. ”Okay lady, get your sweet ass to bed and I will leave you in peace ” he instructed. I had this urge to grab him and kiss him whilst this other part of me wanted him to grab and kiss me. I stood still, waiting, hopeful. He turned and began to walk away. I would never have imagined that I would feel disappointed but that is all I can describe it as. Why was I kidding myself, why would he want to kiss me when I had been such a bitch to him? Maybe it was best that he hadn’t, it would never go anywhere.
As I reached the top of the steps I heard him call out, ”Goodnight Casper ”. I turned to look around, I figured that he had was speaking to a friend he must have bumped into, but there was no one but us to be seen. I watched him until he was out of sight. Casper, what was that all about?.


looking forward to having a professional cover done for my book, I was going to attempt to do one myself on photoshop but I think it’s best if I leave it to the experts. In the mean time I’m trying to decide what to work on next, I have so many ideas swimming around in my head, crying to be out!!

ugly happy tears released

so I finally published my book with Kindle Direct Publishing, very happy and nervous, what if people hate it? I guess for me the main thing is that I finally done something that I’ve always wanted to do and now that I’ve started I can’t stop, writing makes me happier than everything else I’ve ever done so I’m sticking with it, going with the flow. Going to start research for book 2 Ugly Happy Promises but I have another story crying to be let out of my head so I may work on that one first.

a little about Ugly Happy Tears

Taryn Lane has suffered more heartbreak in her young life than most people experience in a lifetime. In Dan she finds all that she has longed for and can start to believe that her future is all that she dreamed it would be.

KC has a reputation and a history, if  the rumors are to be believed, it’s not a good one, but does anyone really know the real Kieran Cole?

Taryn finds an undeniable attraction to KC but she is determined to fight any attraction to him. There is no room for KC in Taryn’s future.

But what if KC feels that same attraction? And what if he is not willing to let Taryn fight against him? What if he is determined to fight for her?

Can both of them leave the past behind? Is Taryn strong enough to begin a new chapter? And will KC be able to fight his own demons?


ugly happy tears

So I’ve finally made a blog for my up coming ebook, Ugly Happy Tears. I’ve finished writing and the body to the book is done. I’ve begun the editing process and there are little parts that I’m not too happy with, they just need a little bit more. So hopefully this week will see me add to what I’ve already wrote. I’m hoping that I will be more or less ready to publish by the weekend, but I’ve said that before and I’m still here writing and editing!